Dear College Dean:

I'm writing this letter to give suggestions about the using of the donations. I support with the proposal of expanding the campus bookstore including music cd, gifts and a snack bar.

The expansion of the campus bookstore can provide the students much more materials for their different interests. We have got a huge amount of students. Some students are interested in computers and they spend their time on staying at the computer lab. But we also have students who loves musics, reading books, etc. If we expand the bookstore, we can also satisfy those part of students who are not really interested a lot in computers unless they need to do their homeworks.

The proposal suggests the bookstore to be expanded with music cds; that is so students can buy them and do some shopping with cds, gifts during the breaks before or after class. This is good place to go to. And students can also get some snacks at snack bar, it is very convenient to combine the bookstore and the snack bar. Students can do both kinds of shopping at one place.

Students who love using computer can still go to the computer lab or the library. There is computers, too. For those interested in music and books they can go to the bookstore, sit there and enjoy. This would be the best way to satisfy both groups of students.

This paper takes a position on the issue defined in the prompt and supports it by including  counterarguments (there are adequate computers on campus and not everyone is interested in using computers extensively), and by describing the benefits of  having more amenities available in the bookstore.  Both the argument and counterarguments are presented with a little detail.  The paper includes an introduction, middle, and conclusion, and the writer uses a few transitions to link ideas.  A basic control of English sentence structure is evident, although there is one sentence error - a comma splice - in the third paragraph.  Errors in grammar and mechanics are evident but do not impede understanding of the writer's meaning.